everyday

Everyday, I feel like drowning. And everyday, I think of tomorrow. Just get through right now. Tomorrow this will be the past. And it is, you know? Like, the tests I have today are over tomorrow. The things that are due are past deadlines once the day is over. But also, it isn't. This test is replaced by that test. This deadline by that one. It's endless and it's exhausting. And you get through it because you have to get through it. That's how it works, you know? You scramble to get everything done because you have to. But I can't do it anymore. I'm drowning I'm drowning I'm drowning. No. I'm slipping. The ground is giving way and I haven't found a solid foot or handhold and I'm slipping. My mental health is all over the place, my emotional health is practically nonexistent, my grades are tanking, and life just keeps going. The carriage of life keeps racing across the countryside, dragging me behind it in the dirt. I don't know what to do.

So I guess I'm going to do homework now, and try to ignore all the homework I've missed and will do poorly, all the grades I've let fall beneath my past standards of excellence. What are standards anyway? Everything is relative. Who cares.